An enigma

A year ago, around the time this blog turned five, I visited my old university to register and to find out what was going on. It was a time when I was a little too morose about some things—most notably about a little infatuation I had back then with a person who shall mercifully remain unnamed. (Yes, dear readers, I have gotten in trouble for dropping names. That is one of the low lights of my blogging time.)

In fact, I was so morose that I decided to mention that line which an old philosophy professor often quoted, a saying from a Chinese sage about the making of wheels. If I were less morose, I would be a little more generous and drop a few hints.

*****

In any case, today I must admit something. I am still inept at figuring out how to go public with how I feel about anyone, especially about, well, the one person whom I discovered in the past few weeks proved to be a surprise.

I would say that this person is a surprise, and rightfully so, because I barely knew this one when I was in university. We met each other again, albeit online, and just after I joined a social network on which both of us were. And then, a year on, I was surprised.

Being surprised is really part of who I am, because that really is the nature of grace. It is never predictable, and as I mentioned to this person today, it is never tidy. Ironically, even if one would be tempted, as I am, to be neat and tidy and be quiet, I can only say that I am beginning to appreciate this surprise. And while I am not going to be as open about it as I would, and rightfully so, I should add that it is a most lovely one.

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